Maysey’s journey from the family home to a home of her own

Since moving into a Supported Independent Living (SIL) home with Brighter Access, Maysey has increased her independence, taken on more responsibilities, and settled into a new routine. What has been a smooth transition for Maysey has been a little harder emotionally for her parents Renee and Greg, and two brothers, who miss having her around the family home.

“For Maysey, the transition has been amazing. I have mixed feelings; sometimes it’s guilt, sometimes I just miss her, but I only have to come here for 15-20 minutes, and I realise how happy she is, and I’m good for a couple of days,” Renee said.

The decision to set a goal of greater independence through SIL wasn’t something Renee and Greg had thought about earlier on in the family’s NDIS goal driven journey. However, a conversation while ordering Maysey a learn to read kit through the Down Syndrome Association in Queensland put everything into perspective, Renee said.

“Mayey’s short-term working memory is such that if she doesn’t use it, the skill will go. She’d forgotten how to read and during COVID lockdown we thought it would be great for her to focus on because she couldn’t do her regular activities. The Down Syndrome Association has a great kit to help people with Down Syndrome learn to read. It’s geared towards visual learning.

“The woman I spoke to is a Supported Independent Living (SIL) specialist who helps families who have a child with Down Syndrome to transition and she said it was Maysey’s right to be as independent as she can be, away from her family, like everyone else which got us thinking about it,” Renee said.

Prior to the official move-in Maysey, with supports from Brighter Access, stayed in local AirBNB homes to start learning new skills and transitioning, something Maysey handled extremely well. Renee found comfort in asking Maysey when she had settled in if she’d rather be at home with Mum or Dad, or be at Maysey’s house, and being told “Maysey’s home”.

“The first two weeks I laid in bed at night thinking and thinking. [Accommodation Manager] Abby has received lots of emails from us but she’s been amazing. She’s never made me feel like I’m a nuisance. The last time I had a request I sent the email, popped around the next day and saw what I had asked had already been implemented and I love that,” she said.

Brighter Access Accommodation Manager Abby McGregor acknowledged how difficult the transition can be for families.

Maysey planted beautiful flowers at her new SIL home.

“I knew how hard this transition was going to be for Maysey’s family, as it is for most. Something we often see is the guilt associated with having your loved one move into Supported Independent Living. I all too often hear the fears ‘I don’t want them to think we don’t want them, or I just never thought they wouldn’t live with us forever’.

“Supporting the family to embrace this is a normal transition time in many people’s lives and allowing them to create those same experiences was very important to me. Having Renee come to the house and decorate, contribute to the daily planning and reassuring the family that this is just the next step in Maysey becoming an independent and thriving woman was very important for me.

“Supported Independent Living requires a lot of trust between the family or carers and the organization. I personally feel very responsible for the people I manage and being able to assure them that their loved one is safe, well and living their best life with us is my ultimate goal.”

“The first day Maysey moved into her new home she said ‘Mayseys flat’ and I watched her and her support worker dance together in the loungeroom. That was a very special moment for me. Also having staff take her to buy a birthday present for her brother and go to her family’s home for dinner. It doesn’t seem like a lot to most people, but that is exactly what this family had wanted and needed. A home of her own to be independent and thrive, that allows her to still be included in the family as any 20+ year old daughter would,” Abby said.

And for Maysey, she has mastered living independently. Maysey cleans, cooks, grocery shops, does the washing, takes the bins out, waters the plants and all the other jobs that come with living out of home. She also finds comfort in spending time relaxing in her own space.

 “When she was living at home, Maysey would have to come with me if we had an event on or something was happening because I couldn’t leave her at home by herself. I’d have to say ‘Mays, I’m sorry but you have to come with me’ and all she’d say is ‘stay home’ now she has the option, if she wants to stay home, she can!” Renee said.

Maysey’s amazing new home is in a complex of three other units, and with the communal aspect, Maysey can also enjoy regular social interaction with her neighbours.

“The road to where we are today has been long and hard for Maysey and her family. Maysey started with us at Brighter Access at a very young age, and to see her transition through to now living independently with the support of her family and our amazing staff is such a proud moment for me,” Abby said.